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The Drunk Monkey and Self Esteem

The drunk monkey is obsessed with I Am Not Enough: smart enough, talented enough, handsome/beautiful enough, strong enough. Undeserving. Unqualified. Unworthy. Ever feel like an imposter? The Drunk Monkey wants you to believe you are flawed, insufficient and in some way defective. Less than. It's not just you.

From CEOs and Celebrities to Bricklayers and Basket Weavers, from eating disorders and addictions to all types of depression, I AM NOT ENOUGH is at the root of it all. And it's an international epidemic. Whereas most of the Drunk Monkey's tendencies are annoying, this one is downright dangerous and must be dealt with.

Enlightened Perspective

In fact, you are more than enough. You always have been and always will be more than enough. You are in fact, perfect, doing you in your own perfect way that nobody else can do. If you consider that 50% of what you believe to be true about yourself and the world, was established by your 7th birthday. Children make a lot of incorrect conclusions. Toddlers and children cannot assign blame or fault to a parent. It's not in them. So whatever happens at home, they assume, incorrectly, it is their fault. _______ happened, it's my fault. I must be unworthy in some way.

The drunk monkey judges, criticizes, belittles and insults you at every turn.

It is acutely aware of your deficiencies, short-comings and perceived flaws in character and physical body. It can range from mild contempt, to all out tongue lashings. The drunk monkey is like having your own personal critic in your head, watching your every move and ready to remind you of your failures and disappointments.

Enlightened Perspective

Tune into the voice in your head when you look in the mirror or when you make a mistake and ask yourself: would you ever speak to another person like that? Would you have any friends if you did? See yourself as a Child of God, doing the best you can. Words are powerful, like little spells, and none more powerful than the words we speak to ourselves. Wield them wisely.

The Drunk Monkey has impossibly high standards and demands perfection. It is ruthlessly unforgiving of past failures and mistakes.

Perfectionism commonly leads to paralysis: taking no action at all. It sucks the joy out of achieving your accomplishments and strains relationships, as nobody ever measures up. At the core, the drunk monkey is woefully insecure and caught up in the opinions and approval of others.

The nature of the survival mind is to keep you away from risk/danger. In this case, taking risks, and trying new things risks humiliation. You need to understand that there really is no such thing as failure, unless you give up and stop learning. Pursue excellence instead, as perfectionism is that nobody is perfect. Disappointments are necessary. And the imaginary tribe of critics judging and critiquing your every move, is in fact, all in your head.


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